one
thousand words daily
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| Who dat is? That bandana is really dope though! |
Day 16: the tides
As I
rise before the sun as I do many days for one reason or two. This reason being
intense pain in both legs and not simply insomnia, I say a prayer of gratitude,
for that’s only the best attitude and lay out a plan of many things I must do. My day doesn’t differ from others much except
that I have to navigate my surroundings in particular ways from how and where I
decide to drive to where I decide to take a step. With determination in my mind, pain
throughout my body and love in abundance in this tired heart, I embark on a
journey which leads me to this post. For
days I have had plans to write, with many ideas such as the crazy dreams I have
been having while in slumberland, dreams we hold as individuals all the way
back the dreams of our parents. For
today, at least just for this day I will talk about my dreams as a successful
writer.
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| Two of many manuscripts in the works |
plans
and detours
My
plan was to finish typing from manuscript, the second chapter to a book I once
started yet got stolen once one of my laptops and belongings went missing,
along with a car rental a year ago. At
this time I was just learning to once again walk yet had organized most of my
writings… without using a good flash drive or online cloud drive to save
things. Boy did I learn a hard
lesson. Today I completed that second chapter
of The Lioness, a very surreal yet detail oriented dream I once had many
years ago before my son was born. I
never forgot this dream nor the impact of it.
This dream was like a sign of things to come, a promise from our Creator
that “There is something specifically meant for you and you alone.” I wanted to square away some ideas from that
dream, so that I could begin with task number two of today; complete my book of
Robin and the Red Tailed Hawk.
Although
I had to start from scratch (think of a DJ scratching a classic Hip Hop record)
with The Lioness and although I was once between four-six chapters deep
in beginning, I think I’m off to a great beginning, setting a realistic pace
for myself as well. Robin and the
Red Tailed Hawk, transformed from a short anecdotal story I once wrote on a
lost/stolen manuscript into a magnificent work of art, with enough imagination
and wisdom for a book to fill. It’s a
trip how things turn out, right? Who
knows if I’ll be done today, as I have a few illustrations I would like to do
from my mind. My overall goals now are
to complete between two to four books before this year is done. I find it
difficult enough just to walk to the bathroom now or to my vehicle if I forget
something, like the power chord to this computer.
positivity
and getting it in: a short history of me
As I take that stroll, with sharp mind, flag in my
back pocket, sike!!! a dinner towel I got from a gas station with mason jars on
it I use as a bandana, having Jimmy Cliff’s “You Can Get it if You Really
Want,” playing on repeat in this crowded brain of mine. I know I have many
miles to still go regardless. As far as
that rag, or flag thing goes, I’ve been on that grown-man shit, my hustle since
I first decided that I was a man (say around 16 and ½, 17 or so). I’ve been a
counselor of many sorts since: starting from a Street Outreach Worker (street
counselor), Health Educator to a Prevention Case Manager, HIV Test Counselor,
Drug Rehabilitation Counselor for youth, Medical Case Manager, Soldier for
Truth and Gang Counselor at “Rock in the Hood,” (something my bro Flo began as
he got his life in order and was given a way, a supreme outlet to uplift
others,) I reflect on success. From
Health Education, before as well as after the accident, I turned into a
progressive and very hungry Cannabis Consultant, starting many things,
influencing the game and helping hundreds, perhaps thousands in many outright
as well as unseen ways.
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| A pic of me from the New York Times conducting Outreach & Testing... in Manhattan! |
Being
a visionary ain’t easy and I’m not even trying to be cheesy. I now write and
I’m cool with that. There’s a ten year old that wants to spend more time with
me, also a child waiting to be born into this world with my genes attached,
therefore hope for many reasons resides here!
With assistance unseen from the divine or concrete such as the amazing
support and compassion shown from my fiancé, I can only be thankful. As this gentleman sitting across from me
offers to assist with plugging up my laptop, with my legs on “Damn,” mode,
although there are troubles in the world that piss me off, I can only be
hope-filled and seek solutions within my reach.
We can all shoot for the stars to say the least. We can plot and plan throughout all of life’s
twists and roller-coaster turns. What matters is how he choose to go forth with
we are left with, how to handle the situations presented to us, whenever and
however they come on a plate or platter.
take chances
yet choose wisely
When
given an unbelievable opportunity or a stroke of insight which benefits, we are
encouraged by others to “run with it,” like a wide receiver that instead of
running far with arms wide open, took the hand off and the yards he could take. When we sense the tide rising or falling we
have but a few choices; stay there and deal with the waves, which will pass,
swim, paddle or boat to deeper water so we don’t get stuck in the mud or get
the fuck out of the water, period! Some
folks have opinions which differ such as “I wouldn’t have been in that water in
the first place,” adding, “I don’t know what’s in there?” Why be afraid to get a little wet, I mean,
it’s bound to rain some muthafuckin time so… live with it and enjoy what life
it brings.
This
reminds me of a dream I had the other night. In the dream I was visiting a
community of folks that lived on the water, on a river somewhere:
As the
dream changed quickly from good times and laughter to immediately dreary, the
water soon rose, causing massive flooding which some could not escape. The owner, or elder in charge of one
property, which had its own dock, had the task of what to do with the bodies of
the deceased. He did as his neighbors
did and tied and wrapped up his deceased loved ones one by one, letting them
float with a small weight attached to their legs so their head barely touched
the surface, at least until the waters receded.
As I swam in this dream, yes I had to swim in the flood waters at one point;
I remember small bubbles being around each of the submerged bodies. I have yet to pull the meaning from this
realistic dream but it’s all good in the hood! Now to do a poem for y’all that
had courage to read and get back to the task at hand, completing my book.
Thick murky waters rise ever so high regardless if
we can swim
In a places that for the decisions we have made
Refuse to run dry
As toxic refuse floats along with lost dreams
We once again look for answers and a way seeking
refuge
Amongst real folks, those strong with deep
foundations and dry land
Realizing mistakes must be made we..
Building businesses, relationships and friendships
upon loose shifting sands
Then we wonder how it could have happened
What must have I done wrong if any
Prolonging the electric change we are meant to
create as well as participate
Knowing hard lessons learned, hold as much gold as
money earned
Perhaps then we will learn to plant in better soil
or
Swim up river where the waters are fresher and
Dig the foundation of our houses miles away from
On higher ground from the levels of the seas
For, we will arise, standing up proud with
integrity held and dignity
Seeking no pity whether we are tall or broken down
to our knees
Praying for justice some can do while
Others build differently each for the heavens for
that hardcore miraculous substance
Building and moving mountains where others meager
foundations have failed
Materializing dreams into reality, making believers
out of the most hectic of skeptics
Showing the many ways in which having faith
prevails
The Tides
10-16-2018
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